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These are the questions I am battling right now. I'm not depressed, but I'm bummed out. Just ho-hum through the day. I stay plenty busy, especially the last few days. I know I've written about this before HERE and HERE. It has been awhile, because I have been doing good, really good. I ran 3 races this summer, met my goal weight, felt strong and energized. Then...it's gone. My goal weight is now, another goal. I still feel strong, but not strong willed enough to get out of bed in the morning to go lift those weights. I am eating bad, again. I know I shouldn't eat the swiss roll...as I put it in my mouth, but I do it anyway. WHY?
I'm in the frump mode. Yoga pants, sweatshirt, hat and no make up. I know I can do it again but I need to mentally get my head in the game to make it work. It is frustrating, oh so frustrating. I'm reading a new book the next few days that I hope will inspire me and get me jump started. Monday is the day for change. I've done it before...I can do it again. The 'baby weight' is long gone...this is just 'stupid weight' that is no one's fault but mine. I want to wear those new 'thin' jeans I just bought 5 months ago. I gave away all of my 'fat clothes' and I refuse to get anywhere near my old size again.
Matt has lost 35 pounds so far and my dad has lost 85 in the last 12 months. If that isn't inspiring, I don't know what is! I will try to feed of their success to fuel my own motivation!
So, here it goes, again. I'm ready to make the change. 15 is my number...I will do it!
12 comments:
I totally and completely relate. When I feel really down about it I tell myself I should just forget it because I will never look like I did 10 years ago. But that shouldn't be the case, right? Maybe we should have some little contest among friends or something? I just hate that it takes work ya know. I'm lazy. And tired. And now I'm cold (in the early morning :)!!! And I only have 2 kids! I think you look great. And it is you and other friends that have inspired me to start running. I run my first 5K in two weeks. Next it is on to a 10K and I'm terrified.
o.k. so you look absolutely amazing, skinny, healthy, and beautiful to me! of course, i go through the same cycle of frustration regularly so i don't know why we wonderful women do that to ourselves!! do you mean by your number is 15 that you have 15 lbs. to lose? if so, i do, too. i really think you look fantastic where you are!
Oh my Alison. This post COULD NOT have come at a better time. Seriously! I have spent almost EVERY night (not to mention every morning as well) in tears just looking at myself. I am the exact same way. I'm far below my pre-pregnancy weight - but I can't stand how I feel and look. I can't be happy with myself lately. I tried dieting (ha - MANY diets actually) but can't seem to stick to one! My friend and I are working out together (have been for over a month now) but we've both vowed to start a new diet on Monday as well! So here's to US! :) We can motivate each other.
And you truly do look amazing. I am so thankful to see someone though that looks as great as you do have *bad days*! You GO ALISON!! :) You're such an amazing person! Thanks for the post!
Don't be so hard on yourself (easier said than done, I know). Yes, ALL of us women go through the same emotions. Just remember that this body that you have is great and amazing (no matter what the size and number) and let's you do many things- bare and raise children, run races, go places you want to see, etc. You're beautiful and amazing however you look and whatever you do. (to feel inspired, go to my friends blog- sacajawea-sings.blogspot.com)
I'm sad but glad to see someone else feels bummed today- I don't know what my problem is but I feel weirdly depressed. I keep trying to think of a reason why (besides needing to lose weight) but can't quite put my finger on it. You will do it though!!! You have done so well so focus on that :) It's always harder when the holiday seasons start for sure.
You have amazing determination and self control. I have always been impressed by what you accomplish when you set your mind to something. Give yourself a little break. You've made wonderful choices and worked so hard this year. I don't believe that 15 should be your number. You are a babe, sis!
Ali, you are so hard on yourself. I know this because I hear it all the time from my husband! It's so hard to find a balance - taking care of your family and yourself. You have to give yourself credit because you do a great job of both! I am always inspired by all of your craftiness. If this is something you really want, I know you can do it. The key is being happy and love yourself so that you can love others. Good luck!
50, that's my number. Will I stick to it? Probably not. The scale is my enemy, as are my thighs. ;)
Ali, don't be so hard on yourself, really. Your body (as Sarah said) is such a great blessing. It lets us do so many things. There are many reasons why the scale goes up and down. Don't be so focused on the number and focus on eating well and having healthy snacks in the house. You are beautiful, really beautiful, inside and out. We love you so much and couldn't be more proud of the wonderful daughter, wife, and mother you are. Most important, your Heavenly Father loves you for who you are, and he knows you best. Focus on all the good you do. It will give you the needed boost to keep going. Love you! Mom
For most of my life I have felt that many people defined me by what I weighed whether it was consciously or subconsciously.
After I while, I began to buy into
what I felt other people thought.
I have discovered that worrying about what others think of you is a total waste of time and emotional energy. You have to work on becoming the best person you can become because it is what YOU want to do. It was only then that I could take off almost 90 pounds this last year.
Don't define who you are by what you weigh. It is an emotional snake pit. You are an amazing woman, and a wonderful Mom and daughter. Love, Dad
I second what your Mom and Dad wrote! You are amazing! Be realistic! You need to live healthy but also in a way that is reasonable. In my opinion 15 is way to severe because you will have to police yourself constantly. I think you should worry more about maintenance because your body keeps returning to a natural weight (where you are now). What ever you choose to do will be worth the results. Satan knows women are our own worst enemies.
Thanks everyone! I am totally crying reading your comments. Sometimes it is hard to pull yourself out of the hole I feel like I am in. We do have amazing bodies that we are blessed with. I need to find my happy place and be happy there, not always wanting something else. Thank you for you wonderful statements and compliments, they really make all the difference! You are all amazing and I am blessed to have you in my life! I love you!
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